Preparing Your Child For Therapy

Parents often ask how they should approach their child about coming in for the first therapy session. The answer varies since each child and each situation is different, but here are some general ideas I share.

1. Don’t lie or mislead:

This sounds obvious but it’s more common than you’d imagine. Lying or misleading increases confusion and lack of trust, which immediately transfers to the counselor. This makes establishing rapport more difficult and jeopardizes the therapeutic connection.Roblox Hack No Survey No Download

2. Reinforce the idea that no one needs to be “fixed”:

Be a part of the problem and the solution together. It’s beneficial for parents to accept responsibility for the changes they need to make. Parents sometimes find this difficult as it’s a fine line between accepting responsibility and maintaining authority.1

3. Have answers for the following questions, even if they aren’t asked:

Why do you feel it’s necessary to begin counseling?
Why have you picked a particular counselor?
What will your role be in therapy?
Who else knows about the appointment?
Who else will participate in the sessions?
What are you willing/needing to change as a parent?
What is the desired outcome of therapy?

4. Prepare them for the first session as much as you possible:

Talk to the counselor to find out what takes place during the first session. Some questions include:

How long will the first session last?
What will be discussed?
Who participates in the first session?
How does confidentiality work?
What is expected of the child?
Where is the office located?2

5. Give them control over counseling:

Not every counselor is going to be able to establish a connection with every child. Personalities simply don’t match sometimes. Make sure your son or daughter understands as long as they give therapy a fair shot they decide if they continue. Sometimes it takes a couple of attempts to find the right “fit” so let them have a say.


  1. This is a topic for a whole other post. But I would argue that admitting fault is one of the best ways to maintain “authority”. Authority is often thought of in a militant style. But a mentoring style of parenting leads to mutual respect. Discipline is important but should be secondary. 

  2. Knowing your destination significantly decreases anxiety. 

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