A lot of people feel therapy will be beneficial but once they find themselves sitting in a therapist’s office they find out how challenging it can be to become vulnerable enough to do anything more than what I call, therapy around the edges.
Diving into your core issues is like diving from the highest diving board in the deepest pool. We’ve all been up on that plank, looking down to the pool below. Many things can go wrong from a high dive. It takes great courage to leap into the air.
Addressing your core issues in therapy also takes a tremendous amount of courage. It’s a leap of faith to accept that addressing your pain, your shame or your fears will have a beneficial outcome. After all, you’ve made it this far without having to take a good look at your core issues, is it worth the risk?
People think of therapy as a necessity for acute or emergent issues. You lost your job. Your depression worsened. A family member passed away. But therapy can also be about self development, self empowerment and self love.
As a therapist, I don’t judge you for wanting to avoid the “deep dive”. I have my own deep pools I avoid at all costs. It’s uncomfortable. Actually, it’s more than uncomfortable – it seems unbearable.
But that’s where the change is. That’s where we become whole.
So before you go to therapy make a list. What are the top three things you don’t want to tell anyone else or ever talk about? Chances are those are your core issues you should discuss in therapy.
If you don’t know where to start with your list I suggest you try free association writing.
Some people are “shoot from the hip” in therapy. They come in, sit down and just start launching into all of it. And some people want to get to know the therapist first, build that trust, let the deeper issues marinate a bit before diving in.
Either way is perfect, but having that list in your back pocket will help you stay accountable to yourself when you are up there on the diving board.
So what do you say…ready to dive in?